??? DIET - DAY 1

Started another fad diet today. i've been eating way too much crap and can feel the flab around my neck increasing. the 1st of the month, the only day of the month you can really start a successful diet, other wise its doomed before you even start blending the leaf soup. i will be keeping to it right til 1pm christmas day! ..1:03 i will be celebrating the end by forcing a whole chocolate orange down my throat. over the past few years i've spent a good amount of my time experimenting with different eating and drinking techniques. first came the STUDENT diet. this was quite easy to follow..1) do NOT cook anything! 2)fast food is a MUST! at least 3 times a day 3) spend all your student loan's on booze and gambling. next up i tried the ALPHABET diet. it lasts 26 days. you must only eat food beginning with letter of that day..for example (refering to my diet log..true! i did keep one) on 'J day' i ate jelly babies, jaffa cakes, jam roly poly, and jetters (funny shaped breaded turkey for kids). then i tried the ATKINS diet, which was hell! i cracked on day 10 and ate 5 kiwi's and a box of clusters! the SKELETOR diet worked well recently. basically you don't eat anything..all day, then just at the point of fainting..you grab whatever's nearest to you and eat as fast as you can. the POOR MAN diet is a diet i keep coming back to. it's more or less the same as the 'skeletor' except you don't eat because you don't have the pennies to pay for it. so, time to unveil the new one. it's called the GROUNDHOG diet! very straight forward this one, i eat the same food everyday..everyday..everyday..groundhog day. nothing else allowed! not very exciting is it? what an anti-climax. anyway, let's meet my new buddies who i'll be murdering everyday til the queen raises her glass on christmas day...