DREAMS (Of Animals That Can Eat Humans)
Thursday night my dog and cat were being eaten by a massive croc which was swimming in the river at the bottom of my old garden. i dived in to save them but was eaten too. last night my dad, brother and i were watching tv..this man was dressed as a shark and went swimming in the sea to try and attack real sharks. this gave my dad inspiration, he took us all to a swimming pool where he instructioned my brother and i to stand and wait til sharks took bites out of our legs. my brother was well up for this! i was'nt to keen but went along with it. my brother left the pool with all his limbs, my dad and i climbed out embarrassed that we just had the 1 leg each. dad, what were you thinking!??
CBB (Night Of The Living Dead)
Late late night watching celeb big brother, drawing in the style of a GCSE art student with a chip on his shoulder..
LOOK AFTER YOUR PENS AND YOUR PENS WILL LOOK AFTER YOU
About to brave the cold and step out of my house for the first time in 2 days. i've been doing very important things like sorting my pens. now i be off to buy some beans and dr pepper to mix with me vodka..celebrate celebrities stuck in a house on the TV!
TV WOW
It don't get much better than this..tonight..celeb big brother 4! then straight after (you don't even need to lift a finger) 'Ricky Meets Larry'! Larry David and Ricky Gervais chatting about stuff that annoys them for an hour..brilliant! Channel 4 from 9pm. TV..i love you again, internet..i'll see you on friday (don't be jealous).
OLO RADIO DOWNLOADS (Go Get!)
There's been no Olo Radio shows for the last 2 weeks..sorry bout that, but we've been eating and sleeping. we are currently re-building the website cos the last one confused everyone. in the meantime this will have to do. the good news is that we have updated the download page so you can download and listen again to any of the 11 shows we have done so far. we'll be back next weds (11th jan) with a collection of beer mats which we'll be flipping and catching between our teeth.
FOPP OFF
Hmmm..bit embarrassing this so i'll put it up on the internet for anyone in the world to read. today was my last day at work..as i was SACKED! i was told just before christmas that i would be shown the door in the new year. maybe saying sacked is a bit dramatic, i was told i would never ever make another carboard box for fopp records again! oh my..this news hit me hard. don't really know why i along with 2 others were picked out for the chop over the other temps, maybe i just did'nt quite have drive needed to pack boxes full of Coldplay cd's for 9 hours a day. well what hope have i if i can't hold down a basic warehouse job? i did admire my boss's style though. very thoughtful..first, take us all out for a christmas piss up, encourage me to drink as much as possible.."pink champagne james?". then, on the very last day before the xmas break (with us all in high spirits) call me in to the office and give me the bad news. yep..ok then. i step out and everyone is swinging to Wizard's "wish it could be christmas everyday" which is booming out of the stereo making me feel like a burnt mince pie. then lastly after boxing day he presents all the temps who got to stay on with BEAUTIFUL grey fopp fleece's to keep them warm. ahh..i am soo jealous and FREEZING! in my jumper as they parade around. "no hands off, fleece for big boys only..i want you see you shiver while working for me..rah ha ha ha!!" he did'nt really say that, he just thought it.
What now? i may ask HairHandHair if there is any work going over at the Olo Radio offices.
What now? i may ask HairHandHair if there is any work going over at the Olo Radio offices.
LIVING IN THE PAST
In my head 2006 still has'nt begun. the reason for this, i shall report tomorrow as i still have 1 day left of the chapter to complete. here are some photos starting with 25th dec and ending with the afternoon of jan 1st. christmas dinner was amazing!! so good i did it all over again 10 minutes after i had finished it. had a really nice time back home over the 3 days i had off (3 days!! god, i hate work..well, i did sneak another 2 days off..ha!). saw all my family and friends who i'd really missed..blub blub. Boxing day i went to the races..every horse i backed lost. was a great day though especially fur meiner bruder who won £75 on a pony or won a £pony on 75 horses..cockneys..eh!? went out for a good old fashioned piss up on the 27th for a mate's birthday. ended up in a curry house, where i got into a bit of a mess..fell off my chair and as i grabbed for the corner of the table, i pulled the table cloth and a few balti dishes with it (see pics below). over the xmas period i found out that i picked the wrong guys in the ID parade (from my mugging) but got my camera back. think i'm gonna cover my new ipod with carboard or foil so future muggers pick on someone else..maybe one of the posh toffs down my road who probably have a different mp3 player for each day of the week. new years eve was pretty uneventful, went to a pub then house party, don't really remember much..wait a minute, if weds is new years day then tomorrow is new years eve..hmm maybe i'll dress up as jools holland and entertain my street with some 'boogie-woogie' piano and dancing. I'm really looking forward to weds, i'll be drawing up a plan of attack for the year. one thing i must do is go to the doctors and get a full body M.O.T..hey! i might even get my ear syringed! woo hoo! happy new year! (not yet remember)
Here is some insightful PUDDING CHAT straight from the christmas dinner table!
Here is some insightful PUDDING CHAT straight from the christmas dinner table!
FREE DONUTS
Llyods Bank are now giving out free donuts out to all overdrawn customers. If your credit rating is over 5, strawberry jam is inserted.
STANDING ON THE EDGE OF THE CLIFF WITH A HANDFULL OF OLD PAPERS HAVING MISSED THE DEADLINE..OH
Bit late, but well worth reading if you like counting backwards...
* Pitchfork (who are always very good at these kind of things) round-up 2005, and list their albums and singles of the year.
*Artist's faves of the year.
* Stylus' singles and albums of the year.
* more, more, and more
(obv none of the lists above come close to my own one i did a few weeks back)
* Listen here to this year's festive 50. King Creosote in at number 4..wooo!!
* DoCopenhagen compile their top 50 music videos of the year. some brilliant stuff in there, you should try and watch them all. only just got round to watching the Tom Vek 'nothing but green lights' video which is one of the best i've seen for a while.
FATTY FATTY FATKINS'S LAST MEAL
I'm desperately trying to polish off all my chocolates before 2006, and the new TEAM GOAL season begins. i've got 3 hours during 'the best comedy movies ever' to destroy the evil one's. here goes..
2006 ON HOLD
Ah..jan 1, my favourite day of the year. nothing expected of you and you're are safe in the knowledge that no one is having a better time than you. the whole country is in joggers and christmas jumpers watching 'the world's strongest man'.
Watch this little musical present for you all performed by a penny-less chap recorded yesterday (2005) look out for a brief cameo from me (dressed in yellow)
GROUNDHOG DIET - DAY 23 - 1 DAY TO GO
Nearly there! not touched any nasties for 23 days now. bit of a non-event this. sorry. it's boring.
DRIVING HOME FOR CHRISTMAS
It's friday night, my brother's about to pick me up and then we'll be "driving home for christmas!"
OLO RADIO (22nd Dec)
We have had to move to thursday because of drinking comitments. only 1 hour as too much xmas tunage can be a bad thing as anyone who works in woolworths will agree.
HairHanDHair, Delifinger, and Lionheart eat coal and chocolate oranges..
thurs 8-9pm live from the matchbox
tune in... http://oloworms.co.uk/radio.htm
msn in... pigeonhair@hotmail.com
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