MUNDANE MOMENTS

Last week i..

* was caught speeding. nothing dramatic. 37mph in 30mph zone. £60 and 3 points on my licence. do i not like that.

* spent a few minutes snooping round the 'Deal Or No Deal' studios. drove round and round the buildings trying to catch a glimse of Noel. i had my camera ready. i'll get him before the year's out. who wants a bet i won't? £5? sign up in the comments box.

* intended to give a tramp my brown coins but accidentally dropped a gold and four silver. i went in to retrieve the gold from his flat cap until i realised that i was about to steal from a tramp..and that a large group of people behind me would see. the thing is that tramp probably has more money than i do now. about 10 foot ahead was another tramp who had just seen me generously hand over gold..now he wanted in on the action. had to hand over another golden nugget didn't i.

* was close to tears. Mork, my brother's fish (which we've been babysitting for the last 5 months) came very close to dying. he lost all control of himself and kept bumping into stuff in his tank. it was horrible to watch. the fish doctor suggested my brother feed him garden peas!? guess what..it worked. he's back to his normal boring self. i really don't get why people keep fish. i've taken my salmon out the freezer, gonna have it for tea tonight.